As a young girl, I had a lot of boy crushes but I also believed that they were a major source to catching cooties. A decade ago, I was a ten-year-old elementary student about to promote from fifth grade into the next step of a school career—junior high. I was ecstatic.
My days of a fifth grader were coming to an end. On a breezy day, my older sister, Jessa, told me about her friend, Jeanette, who has a younger brother the same age as I and that he and I would be entering the same junior high at the matching time. I did not think much of it and left it at that—after all, it was a new school, which meant new boys.
Entering junior high as one of the new babies of the school was rather interesting and definitely different from elementary school—the rotation of different teachers everyday with more students and classes was quite refreshing. There were boys and drama-causing girls left and right each with their own different personalities. My sister and her fellow classmates were those who ran the school, as they were eighth graders at the time whilst I was a sixth grader.
As I had a number of boys I fixated on, it was no surprised that Jeanette’s little brother, Jonathan, was one of those boys. Jonathan and I never had classes together; he was just another boy I was physically attracted to by his appearance. Inevitably, seventh grade came right around the corner. First days of school always brought excitement, especially when you pick up your class list and attend those classes, you rejoice as familiar faces crowd the room. In Physical Education, where horrendous uniforms were to be worn as part of your grade and overall comfort for activities—there he was, Jonathan, in my P.E. class, which I would never be able to look cute in because I was running around in such vile clothes that were obligatory.
Days went by and I grew a very strong liking towards Jonathan. One day I decided to approach him, which I in fact did by giving him a salutation as simple as “hi.” In return, he looked at me and blushed as I walked away towards my friend. Point blank—it was an awkward situation. I was lucky enough to at least get his instant messenger screen name—kind of crazy due to the fact the boy has never spoken to me at school. I told one of his best friends, Vinson, that I really liked him and his best friend worked something out.. From then, I was officially Jonathan’s girlfriend. Three months passed—I was able to see Jonathan every day at school since school was about to resume and I was not allowed to date as I was still thirteen. There he was, second day of eighth grade, “Jessica, we need to talk...” “About?” “Us. I think it’s best if we were just friends.” My heart sank, more like it was taken out, thrown to the ground and stepped on. I could not even look at him. It was over.
Eighth grade is commonly the best year because you are superior to the younger grade level students. Not so much for me. I was devastated for weeks, my mother knew and said, “It’s just puppy love.” “Puppy love? I loved him!” I yelled back as tears ran down my cheeks. It was apparent that everyone knew I was too young to be in love but it was how I felt, even at age thirteen.
Two and a half years went by, I was already a junior in high school. My feelings for Jonathan were deceased, or I thought they were. After junior high, I have dated one other guy besides Jonathan. Winter break of junior year was right around the corner, at that time, I was talking to my childhood crush that I used to always see every summer in Long Beach because my parents were not able to take care of my siblings and I during the season so we would stay with my aunts and grandma. I was in contact with him and we talked on the phone for a good two months, he even came to San Francisco for his birthday in which my sister and I went to go see him and his family. I still talked to Jonathan as friends whenever I would see him on instant messenger just to say “hello.” On a December evening in 2006, I saw Jonathan on instant messenger, so I decide to message him. We chatted for a bit but out of the ordinary, he asked me, “would you ever give me a second chance?” I replied, “I honestly don't know.”
It was going good with my childhood crush that I did not want to mess things up until one day I hung out with my friend Michelle. I randomly called Jonathan with my friend Michelle because we were prank calling old friends from junior high. Jonathan was one of our victims. I had to leave Michelle’s house so we ended up talking three-way as I was going home, but Michelle could not talk on the phone any longer so I ended up catching up with Jonathan. After talking to him, fallen feelings have arise and then I knew, I was in a dilemma. Long Beach or San Francisco? Childhood or junior high crush? 500 miles or one? I went to visit Jonathan at his high school to talk about things, and from then I knew. I want someone to be there physically for me rather than a phone call, someone who I can go to the movies and go on lunch dates with. It was hard to explain things to my childhood crush since everything was going great but my heart said San Francisco, junior high, one mile. I was sad for a good two weeks when I finally called Jonathan to tell him that I was finally okay.
Two months passed and escapades continued with Jonathan. Jonathan asked to take me out for an early birthday dinner. We went to Cheesecake Factory that resided on the top floor of Macy*s in downtown San Francisco, where the outside terrace overlooked San Francisco’s Union Square, Saks Fifth Avenue, Tiffany & Co, Levi’s, Niketown, etc. We ate dinner, and I was too full to eat a cheesecake but our waitress insisted that I could not leave Cheesecake Factory without getting a cheesecake so I ordered one anyway. While we waited for our cheesecakes, Jonathan asked, “Are we getting anywhere?” And I answered with a yes. Moments after, he let me know that he was going to use the restroom to be polite, and came back in literally less than a minute. I did not think much to it, I thought to myself, “He is a guy, what do you expect?” Finally, our cheesecakes came out. Mine had the words, “will you be my girlfriend?” around the cheesecake. I was totally dumbfounded because our waitress ended up giving me his strawberry cheesecake while he had my oreo flavored cheesecake. Initially I read it too fast that I thought it had said “Happy Birthday girlfriend?” With a confused expression, “Happy Birthday girlfriend??! I think she gave us the wrong cheesecakes..” “Read it again.” Jonathan said. I read it to myself with a small laugh, knowing that I read it wrong the first time. And then from there, we were together again. I am with the same boy that dumped me on the second day of eighth grade.
Today, we have reached 1,111 days. Two weeks ago, was our three year anniversary. I love you, Jonathan.
April 27, 2007 > June 3, 2003.
